Dismantle. Repair.

When I brought an ice cream cake to a cook out.

When people say that I can’t sing.

When my friend with tattoos noticed that members of One Direction and Justin Bieber have a lot of tattoos.

When people say “I’m really not that drunk.”

What they think they look like,

What they actually look like,

My wonderful, attractive, hilarious followers:

I know you have a good sense of humor. I know you like being part of a community. Why not watch a hilarious show that is still underground before it gets huge? The Chris Gethard Show is blowing up and I promise… you will love it. Much like Tumblr, TCGS community is weird, accepting, and wildly entertaining.

It comes on tonight at 11 EST a thechrisgethardshow.com. Watch it and then inbox me your thoughts if you want. Last week Zach Galifinakis was on it, tonight Amy Poehler is going to predict people’s future, and the regular cast is so freaking charming and weird. Give it a shot. I mean what else are you doing on a Wednesday night?

When I watch adorable cat videos with my friends.

They look at me like, 

When one of my biggest pet peeves is people tapping on their desks and then I started seeing a drummer.

When my doctor asked me out.

And then I realized he literally has ALL of my information and I was like,

When someone mentions my S/O’s ex.

When someone is really fast an efficient at work.

When my manager says I can leave work and then it starts to get busy.

When people talk about me in Spanish.

When I decide to take a break from my responsibilities.

When I find an article of clothing I forgot about.

When I tell people to call me if they need a ride, and then I ignore their call.